I saw this commercial for the first time last night.
Mmmmmkay. If you couldn’t read the small print, it said “What has weed done for you?” Let’s break this down a little.
“I stole from my little sister.”
Believe it or not, potheads don’t typically steal to buy weed. Sure it’s possible this has happened at some point in the history of the world, but people have stolen to get all kinds of stuff. Like shoes. Or Legos. Or iPods. I think what they’ve done is confused pot with crack. And just in case you’re wondering, I’ve never heard of anyone sucking a dick to support their pot habit either.
“I got straight D’s.”
Why didn’t they have anyone on that got straight A’s? I know smokers who have done that. Also, there are people who have never even lit up once that get straight D’s. Should we outlaw stupid people?
“I left my ex-girlfriend 27 messages last night.”
This time they got pot confused with alcohol. It’s called drunk dialing. We’ve all been there.
“I made my mother cry.”
Your mom needs to get out more. “I made my mother high” is a more likely scenario anyway.
“I let people draw on me.”
I would guess that you got drunk and passed out if you let people draw on you, but for the sake of argument let’s pretend you were stoned instead. You provided your friends with a few minutes of quality entertainment. Yeah? So? That’s actually pretty cool of you. I bet your friends think you’re awesome.
“I ditched my friends and let them find their own way home.”
Riiiiight. Potheads are notorious for abandoning their friends and being pretty damn unfriendly all around. It was at this point that I knew this couldn’t be an anti-alcohol PSA because then it would say “I gave my friends a ride and we crashed and then we all died.”