Scraping the bottom of the barrel / Jumping the shark / Wasting bandwidth

Yeah I know that yesterday I promised I would post today. But let’s face it. I’m not a daily poster. I just don’t have it in me. So today I’m going to treat you to some of the texts that are currently stored in my phone. You lucky bastards. By the way, these are all from the wife. So basically these are snippets from her end of a bunch of conversations.

I hate this fucking shit.

I’m at moms. Going to store shortly. Don’t need you. :p

Fucker. / That costs 15 cents.

Uhhhh… / You ask. / Next weekend. What are we doin?

Hi. / Who? / Naaaaaaahhhh

K thanks. :p

Yep. / Im soooo hot / Half of one / Yes / No / Ok i had a shot. Woooo / Red snapper. Crown and cranberry. / Im done. The dizzy is wearing off. / (edited) / Soon as we get home / K. Love you. / (edited)

I know right?!

I want ham and pineapple. Fucker. / WHATEVER.

What in the hell did you put on my baby BOY? / God! He’ll totally catch the gay now.

Yummo!

I’m so wet. / Wait. I toweled off. I’m dry now. / (edited) / (edited) / Oh my science! That’s hot.

(edited) / I don’t like it when ppl don’t txt back. / Shoo. Guess we’re not having lunch together.

Sooo this is stupid.

Uhhh…what are you doing? / Yes / And leaving soon

What’re you doing? / You need to get rid of the hot Chicago nerdy sluts now and txt back. / Srsly? You bought the sluts lunch? At 4 pm?

Whatcha doin?

You freaks wearing your slickers?

I had forgotten about it. What else are we forgetting?

You know what? I guess you had to be there. I’m sorry if none of that made any sense. I’ll have a real post soon.

Not tomorrow, but soon.

3 Comments

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3 responses to “Scraping the bottom of the barrel / Jumping the shark / Wasting bandwidth

  1. Hilarious, but scary because I could actually follow the conversation! I enjoyed it. Thanks for sharing!

  2. That’s impressive. Hell, I’m not even sure myself what all that was about.

  3. LOL at “He’ll totally catch the gay now” and “Oh my science!”

    I don’t need to understand it…your wife is awesome, clearly.

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