1. So yeah we got a dog. The kids are thrilled. They love it when he “gives them hugs” which is a polite way of saying “feverishly humps them.” A couple nights ago, as Big D was getting pounded, he screamed, “Oscar loves giving me hugs!” And then Smella chimed in, “I want a hug [...]
Entries from February 2009
February 18, 2009
Husband/Wife
H: I just realized that it takes 7 keystrokes to type the word “it’s” with my T9 turned on.
W: Ok
H: WHAT THE FUCK??
H: How many does it take on your phone?
W: Four. Why did you curse at me?
H: But it only takes 3 to type “its”
H: Because 7 is way too many
W: You’re a dumb [...]
February 17, 2009
Your tax dollars at work
For the record, when I said in this post:
“The next thing you know, you’ll be getting ass-raped in Gitmo”
I was joking. It was supposed to be hyperbole, not a report on actual procedures used during the Bush administration. Fucking amazing.
February 12, 2009
Fact and Opinion
1. Apparently, Kelly wants to start some kind of blog war, but I’m not biting.
2. So now they’ve arrested eight people because Michael Phelps smoked pot. And Kellogg’s has dropped him. So I guess that anyone who has smoked pot is not qualified to endorse Kellogg’s? For instance, there are several American presidents who are [...]
February 6, 2009
I’m sorry this ends up sounding like a persuasive/argument paper for a high school English class
When I was 18, I bought my first car. It was a piece of shit but I didn’t know it at the time. In hindsight, I guess the $500 price should have tipped me off. But I was 18. And it was my first car. Did I mention it had four tires and an engine? [...]
